(Late post: April 11, 2010)
April 11, 2010
"Poor life..so damn short..." it was probably the last post that my classmate in high school wrote on his wall in his facebook profile.
Written mid-march of this year, then on the 6th day of April we are all shocked by the news that he just passed away.
We're not that close but the news has a big impact for us. We value the bonding our section had during our senior year and his death was a big lost for us.
I thought I'm used to this type of bad news..."death of someone” because it happens every time, whenever and whoever, but I'm not anyway.
Back to the moment I've read all the post stating about this classmate of mine, all the scenes in my high school years flashed in my mind and all I can see is his face, my mind saying “this person is not around anymore. He's gone” and a thought “how would his family and close friends will feel?” I knew it was pain. Since the news of his death, the incident is bothering me a lot and now whenever I think of him my mind says 'it's only there' like 'he no longer live in this world and that person is no longer existing... that thought is hard to bear thinking the times in my senior year. Whenever a thought of our section having a happy get together someday I know there will be a part of us that is missing... one person, one friend, one name, one personality, one smile, one voice, one classmate... ONE JESSEN.
It is my first time to experience a loss of an acquaintance and it's a different feeling loosing a grandfather and uncle (Rest In Peace). I realized it is REALLY so hard to lose a friend. A friend is different in every aspects in our lives, a friend has a unique way to affect everyone's life, each friend has a different role in our lives. With these reason we value our friend so much.
He's right “life is so damn short” I know it is so hard for all of us to accept his death, but as he post it... for me that post is also for us to realized that indeed life is so damn short no matter how long a person may live in his lifetime, but it's the time that make it look so short. A person may die so young yet he knew he'd enjoyed his life in what seems so short. A person may live to a hundred years of his life yet he's not contented in what he seems life is short for him that he keep telling he never done enough, a long life?. That post is there to think that life is too short to waste, no one knew when his time will come.
Posting that I think he already live his life to the fullest, only we are not conscious about it, but think about it, he knew life is short yet he did normal things in his life as if tomorrow is just another day then, in a moment.... he's gone.
No matter how much we wish that he should have some more time to at least say his farewell we should also continue the things we are doing in our lives. I never thought that our senior year will be the last time that our group is complete and the last time we'll be complete sharing happiness being graduates. We should learn that in his death he didn't only leave his life in this world but he also leave us a lesson of reuniting with the past ties we had, a message to inspire us in the life we are living and memories we should remember. In all in his death he let us know the lesson, message and memories on how life works, it's not simply how you walk everyday, how you talk with everyone, how you see the world, but how someone affect anyone. He's only one of the 37 students of the section IV-Alexandrite batch 2006-2007, but has one big impact in his loss.
I don't know him that much, but during our high school years I knew he's a good classmate, seat mate, friend, brother and a best son. With this I thank him for the joyful and happy moments he made with Alexandrite '06-'07.
I wrote this blog to release the sadness I'm feeling right now especially whenever I read those post that my high school friends wrote for him, I really can't believe that this incident happened so early, today is his interment and I can't make up my mind whether to be present at this ceremony but I'd decided not to, It's not my way of saying goodbye to anyone. I want it this way... writing a blog in his memory. With this, I pray for his good soul to be at eternal happiness with God the creator of our lives I know he's happy and contented with Him. I thank God for giving us the chance to meet a person like him in this life and letting him to make unforgettable moments to cherish in HIS SHORT LIFE.
Rest in peace and happiness JESSEN NICKO LINGLING. (1990-2010)
